There are certain traditions that you have to obey in whatever you're doing. In friendly competitions, it's customary to shake hands after playing to show that there are no hard feelings, or at least to give you the chance to try to crush your opponent's hand if you were beaten especially badly. At Christmas, it's traditional to struggle to compose your face into something approximating gratitude when opening a package which contains some "hilarious" socks that are in fact too small for you to wear anyway. When decorating, the tradition is that you only notice that you've missed a spot once you've packed away all your brushes and when leaving a job it's traditional to pretend that you actually like the deadbeats you've been saddled with every day for the last few years and you aren't utterly thrilled at the prospect of moving on (and inevitably saddling yourself with a remarkably similar set of deadbeats).
Blog writing is no exception and has its own tradition - the "I'm sorry I haven't posted in ages" post.
The "I'm sorry I haven't posted in ages" post, or ISIHPIAP as it's known by literally no one at all, serves three important functions. The first is to assure the blogger's hordes of loyal readers (in most cases, the same people that refer to these posts as ISIHPIAPs) that the blogger hasn't been abducted by aliens, shut down by the FBI/CIA/MI5/RAC/YMCA for telling THE TRUTH, infected with a horrific tropical disease, or found by the authorities, having been partially eaten by their own cats, after neighbours started to complain that the smell was even worse than usual. The ISIHPIAP is proof of life, of a sort, and allays any fears that may exist in the blogosphere about the blogger's wellbeing.
The second function of the ISIHPIAP is to ease the blogger back into things. As with any task, blogging is easier with practice, and as he or she spends more time in the real world (scavenging from bins, avoiding eye contact with other humans, hissing at sunlight, that sort of thing) the blogger will find that the mental muscles to create the scathing yet somehow subtly beautiful prose that is their medium begin to atrophy. The ISIHPIAP allows the blogger to discuss (at length if they are especially vain) something that affects them deeply and which they are intimately familiar with, namely themselves and whatever pointless waste of time they've been indulging in instead of the crucial work of typing barely literate hogwash into a browser window.
The third function of the ISIHPIAP is perhaps the most important - it helps to soothe the blogger's ego. Like all areas of human activity, blogging has a series of numbers associated with it, which an insecure person (for example, the sort of person that feels the need to keep a blog) can easily be tempted to use as a score card. If their "friends" have more followers, more views, and indeed more posts on their own blogs, the blogger is bound to feel that they are losing at blogging, much in the same way that they used to come last in school sports days. The sting of this realisation can be harsh, and so the blogger feels it necessary to get something, anything onto their blog to redress the balance a little, and make at least one of the little numbers on the dashboard go up.The ISIHPIAP reminds the blogger of the thrill of making the little numbers go up, and asuages some of his guilt at letting his loyal followers (see: people that call them ISIHPIAPs) go without the benefit of his boundless wisdom.
In the end though, the ISIHPIAP is a tradition, and that's why it's done - they are written because it's the done thing and always has been. Wherever there are deeply lazy and untalented people with blogs, these posts will have a place.
I'm sorry I haven't posted in ages.
Wednesday, 8 August 2012
Thursday, 31 May 2012
May roundup
It all seems to have been a bit quiet in Sheffield blogland this month - I blame the warm weather making people go outside! No good can come of it you know...
Anyway, since I've been shocking on the posting front myself, it's easy for you to go back and see that I changed this month's target to the weaselly "as much Flashbang terrain as possible".
Here's a tour through my results:
As we approach the bank building we spot two stone seats outside. These were Antenociti's Workshop sofas, but they just seemed the wrong shape for sofas to me, so they became street furniture.
Once inside the lobby, you see an information desk and counter, (from Ainsty Castings) and some corporate red seating (again from Antenociti's Workshop) in case you need to wait...
Then, if we sneak up onto the roof, we can hide amongst the (Antenociti's) air con units.
So there you have it. Not a bad bit of work, and I think I've now got enough furniture done for a decent raid on the bank building, which is what I'm planning for a test game between JP and Craig in a week and a half. I have other bits I'd like to prepare for that too, including some stairs - how do you actually get between the floors otherwise?
Anyway, I always like to do a wildcard to go with my monthly targets and this month was no exception. I had a VBCW game planned against Kieron, so I quickly boshed together a few more freedom fighters (including a boys anti tank rifle which I converted to have a historically appropriate monopod rather than the bipod it came with, and which was in no way a response to Kieron having a tank).
I also made the partner to the High Altitude Marksman's Mount for Extended Range (H.A.M.M.E.R), the Siege Insertion Carrier with Knight's Lance Entry (S.I.C.K.L.E., geddit?). Despite being a barely armoured open topped vehicle, this was pretty useful in our game.
Targets for next month? Well, there's still more to do Flashbang terrain wise, so I'll aim to sort out the interior of the other Sarissa Precision building, get the Warbases warehouse I got at Triples ready for the table, and paint the rest of my Ainsty bits and pieces.
Anyway, since I've been shocking on the posting front myself, it's easy for you to go back and see that I changed this month's target to the weaselly "as much Flashbang terrain as possible".
Here's a tour through my results:
Once inside the lobby, you see an information desk and counter, (from Ainsty Castings) and some corporate red seating (again from Antenociti's Workshop) in case you need to wait...
Moving up to the first floor there are offices, so there's some desks, filing cabinets, (all Ainsty) and more seating (Antenociti's).
There's also the water cooler I bought from the Ainsty stand at Triples! I love that model, it was only £1.50 but there's something genius about the use of clear resin for the bottle...
Going upstairs again we come to a store room.
Then, if we sneak up onto the roof, we can hide amongst the (Antenociti's) air con units.
So there you have it. Not a bad bit of work, and I think I've now got enough furniture done for a decent raid on the bank building, which is what I'm planning for a test game between JP and Craig in a week and a half. I have other bits I'd like to prepare for that too, including some stairs - how do you actually get between the floors otherwise?
Anyway, I always like to do a wildcard to go with my monthly targets and this month was no exception. I had a VBCW game planned against Kieron, so I quickly boshed together a few more freedom fighters (including a boys anti tank rifle which I converted to have a historically appropriate monopod rather than the bipod it came with, and which was in no way a response to Kieron having a tank).
I also made the partner to the High Altitude Marksman's Mount for Extended Range (H.A.M.M.E.R), the Siege Insertion Carrier with Knight's Lance Entry (S.I.C.K.L.E., geddit?). Despite being a barely armoured open topped vehicle, this was pretty useful in our game.
Targets for next month? Well, there's still more to do Flashbang terrain wise, so I'll aim to sort out the interior of the other Sarissa Precision building, get the Warbases warehouse I got at Triples ready for the table, and paint the rest of my Ainsty bits and pieces.
Wednesday, 16 May 2012
Office Rocker
The wargamer's butterfly effect strikes again!
I've had very little time for painting so far this month, having been away for a week already. As I was away I was contemplating Flashbang, and when I got back I found I wasn't so keen to keep painting Normans. Since I still have a fair amount of furniture to paint, and I want to get some games going at the club, I've returned to the office furniture I started work on way back in 2011.
What with Triples coming up at the weekend, I feel I have to get these painted before I can go back to the Ainsty Castings stand, too...
I've been trying to keep them as a fairly well matched set, so that they make sense together - I've been doing this with a base coat of Vallejo Brown Sand, followed by a drybrush of Iraqui Sand. I apply the drybrush in a single direction, the idea being to simulate that fake laminate woodgrain effect that you see in dreary offices the world over.
To guarantee a low score this month, I'm changing my target to "as much Flashbang terrain as possible". That's so vague (and in fact I could easily claim to have already done it) that I doubt I'll get any points. Still, if it gets it done, that's good enough for me!
I've had very little time for painting so far this month, having been away for a week already. As I was away I was contemplating Flashbang, and when I got back I found I wasn't so keen to keep painting Normans. Since I still have a fair amount of furniture to paint, and I want to get some games going at the club, I've returned to the office furniture I started work on way back in 2011.
 |
| The Ainsty Castings chap loves me |
What with Triples coming up at the weekend, I feel I have to get these painted before I can go back to the Ainsty Castings stand, too...
To guarantee a low score this month, I'm changing my target to "as much Flashbang terrain as possible". That's so vague (and in fact I could easily claim to have already done it) that I doubt I'll get any points. Still, if it gets it done, that's good enough for me!
Monday, 30 April 2012
End of April Roundup
Time flies when you're having fun, and also when you've got too much to do!
We've reached the end of another month, so as usual it's time to have a look at how I did and think about what I want to do next.
Here's the haul in full:
My target was to finish the Sword Dancer cavalry and another unit of Normans. As I posted last time, I've done that already, although I had an accident with the Sword Dancers and had to repair them, but they're ready to go now.
The Norman knights took me a while to do for some reason. Not sure why, I just never really got into painting them.
As my wildcard I painted the unit of Norman crossbows I got a discount on during the Spring Tide event. I found these much easier going, and I've now inked them too. They're ready for varnish but that's going to wait until we get some dry weather, I'm afraid of the dreaded White Foggy Varnish Thing of Doom that occurs when you spray varnish and there's too much water in the air.
Then, since I'd got a bit more time, I went back to this model that I got as a freebie at Triples last year. Once he's painted he'll give me three warlords on foot for my Anglo Danes, so I can use the Godwinson brothers. At least I think it's the Godwinsons. Unfortunately I'm a bit thick and left my rules at Andy's last night, so I can't check. Whoops.
Targets for next month then. Where do I go from here? Well, I'm not going to have loads of time. I know I always say that, but it's always true! The wife and I found out this month that our upcoming baby will be a girl, due in September :D. With the new arrival we'll need more space, so we're selling our house and buying a new one, we now have offers accepted at both sides. Just to complicate things further I'm away all next week on a bizarre and slightly terrifying stag do - 9 men on a canal barge in Norfolk. I hope everyone packs deodorant. And, because all that's a bit much to afford, remaining free time will be spent on eBaying off some of my less useful models and anything else that sits still too long.
So all of those things will be targets to start with, but you good people don't really care about any of that, you want hobby results! You hard taskmasters you. Alright then, to please you I'm going to aim for another unit of Norman knights, plus... something Flashbang related (Flashbang being the close quarters skirmish game I wrote but still need to prepare more models, terrain and rules for). Not sure what, but I'll give updates when I know what I'm doing. Oh, and I'll varnish the crossbows too, if it ever stops raining!
We've reached the end of another month, so as usual it's time to have a look at how I did and think about what I want to do next.
Here's the haul in full:
My target was to finish the Sword Dancer cavalry and another unit of Normans. As I posted last time, I've done that already, although I had an accident with the Sword Dancers and had to repair them, but they're ready to go now.
The Norman knights took me a while to do for some reason. Not sure why, I just never really got into painting them.
As my wildcard I painted the unit of Norman crossbows I got a discount on during the Spring Tide event. I found these much easier going, and I've now inked them too. They're ready for varnish but that's going to wait until we get some dry weather, I'm afraid of the dreaded White Foggy Varnish Thing of Doom that occurs when you spray varnish and there's too much water in the air.
Then, since I'd got a bit more time, I went back to this model that I got as a freebie at Triples last year. Once he's painted he'll give me three warlords on foot for my Anglo Danes, so I can use the Godwinson brothers. At least I think it's the Godwinsons. Unfortunately I'm a bit thick and left my rules at Andy's last night, so I can't check. Whoops.
Targets for next month then. Where do I go from here? Well, I'm not going to have loads of time. I know I always say that, but it's always true! The wife and I found out this month that our upcoming baby will be a girl, due in September :D. With the new arrival we'll need more space, so we're selling our house and buying a new one, we now have offers accepted at both sides. Just to complicate things further I'm away all next week on a bizarre and slightly terrifying stag do - 9 men on a canal barge in Norfolk. I hope everyone packs deodorant. And, because all that's a bit much to afford, remaining free time will be spent on eBaying off some of my less useful models and anything else that sits still too long.
So all of those things will be targets to start with, but you good people don't really care about any of that, you want hobby results! You hard taskmasters you. Alright then, to please you I'm going to aim for another unit of Norman knights, plus... something Flashbang related (Flashbang being the close quarters skirmish game I wrote but still need to prepare more models, terrain and rules for). Not sure what, but I'll give updates when I know what I'm doing. Oh, and I'll varnish the crossbows too, if it ever stops raining!
Thursday, 26 April 2012
The Norman Conquest (of my desk at least)
Yes, I know, I know. I've been terribly slack at keeping the blog up to date recently. It really is a very poor show. Still, real life things seem to be going very well at the moment and I've been able to do a little painting, so, having finally got around to taking some photos, I thought I'd get a post up and share them with you.
Man the new Blogger photo upload thing sucks! I'm really not sure what they thought they were doing with it, but now I only seem to be able to upload a single photo at a time (although the message says "your photos are being uploaded"!) and although it's nice that I can pick settings before I add the photo, I can't pick Extra Large and I don't get a progress bar. When you change your UI, you're meant to make it better, not worse...
Anyway, rant over, let's have a look at some models.
If you remember, the target for April was to get a unit done for Saga, and the Sword Dancer cavalry for VBCW. You won't see any of the Sword Dancers in this post I'm afraid. They were all painted, and I managed to take advantage of the twelve minutes this month when the rain stopped to get them varnished. They were sat on a bit of card outside being sprayed, and a gust of wind flipped the card over, dashing the brave Sword Dancers onto the flagstones below. It was carnage, and some repairs are needed before they're photo ready.
But I didn't break my hearthguard! I'm following the same basic colour scheme with these as with my Anglo Danes - muted-ish colours generally, simple geometric shields, and colour coded bases to tell the unit types apart.
These models are from the Gripping Beast set I won for "best painted" at the Winter is Coming event we ran at Wargamers Free Company a while ago. They're really nice, but they came with metal spears and I've copied Andy's technique for replacing them with florist's wire.
Speaking of Winter is Coming, this month I also took part in Spring Tide, the latest WFC Saga event. This was ably run by JP, and through the genius of his final scenario I was able to rack up loads of kills, winning myself a copy of the new Northern Fury add on!
While we were there we got an extra discount at Wargames Emporium, and I took advantage to get myself the eight Norman crossbowmen you see here - currently painted and needing some ink.
Man the new Blogger photo upload thing sucks! I'm really not sure what they thought they were doing with it, but now I only seem to be able to upload a single photo at a time (although the message says "your photos are being uploaded"!) and although it's nice that I can pick settings before I add the photo, I can't pick Extra Large and I don't get a progress bar. When you change your UI, you're meant to make it better, not worse...
Anyway, rant over, let's have a look at some models.
If you remember, the target for April was to get a unit done for Saga, and the Sword Dancer cavalry for VBCW. You won't see any of the Sword Dancers in this post I'm afraid. They were all painted, and I managed to take advantage of the twelve minutes this month when the rain stopped to get them varnished. They were sat on a bit of card outside being sprayed, and a gust of wind flipped the card over, dashing the brave Sword Dancers onto the flagstones below. It was carnage, and some repairs are needed before they're photo ready.
But I didn't break my hearthguard! I'm following the same basic colour scheme with these as with my Anglo Danes - muted-ish colours generally, simple geometric shields, and colour coded bases to tell the unit types apart.
These models are from the Gripping Beast set I won for "best painted" at the Winter is Coming event we ran at Wargamers Free Company a while ago. They're really nice, but they came with metal spears and I've copied Andy's technique for replacing them with florist's wire.
While we were there we got an extra discount at Wargames Emporium, and I took advantage to get myself the eight Norman crossbowmen you see here - currently painted and needing some ink.
With all the dark ages models I try to make each model an individual and mix up the colours as much as I can - especially for a skirmish game this just seems right to me. The crossbows form my "wild card" for the month and I've really enjoyed doing them, even though they're quite simple - I think I'm just in a Saga mood at the moment. I'm playing aggressively in the club campaign so having these to take my Norman force up to a sensible 5 points (without using unmounted melee troops which Normans can't do much with) will come in handy!
Just need to ink these and fix up the broken Sword Dancers, and I'm done for April...
Saturday, 14 April 2012
Mid month progress
As I've been busy this month with trying to find somewhere to live, I've been very slack with the blogging.
I have done some painting though, which includes the first batch of Sword Dancer cavalry for my Very British Civil War force. And here they are:
I used German WW2 forage caps with the peaks cut off to approximate the caps that the real life Sword Dancers wear. Although they all have matching uniforms, their kit is deliberately mismatched - so belts, gloves, blankets etc are all different. The idea is that they've scrounged what they needed wherever they could - including the standard bearer who's sitting on the Union Flag that his flagpole originally had on it.
Next stop, more Normans!
I have done some painting though, which includes the first batch of Sword Dancer cavalry for my Very British Civil War force. And here they are:
I used German WW2 forage caps with the peaks cut off to approximate the caps that the real life Sword Dancers wear. Although they all have matching uniforms, their kit is deliberately mismatched - so belts, gloves, blankets etc are all different. The idea is that they've scrounged what they needed wherever they could - including the standard bearer who's sitting on the Union Flag that his flagpole originally had on it.
Next stop, more Normans!
Sunday, 1 April 2012
March Round Up
Well, March is over and I met all my targets and more besides!
Ha! April Fool! I actually suck.
My targets for April were to paint my Sword Dancer cavalry for Very British Civil War, build some Sword Dancer infantry, and paint a unit for Saga.
As I've already posted, I did the unit for Saga:
I also painted Alan the horse:
I put together the Sword Dancer infantry (I like how these have come out, especially the sniper! More on them in future I think.):
But despite starting them, I didn't get the Sword Dancer cavalry done:
I just didn't get into doing these. I'll try again for April I think, but at the moment I'm mostly in a Saga frame of mind. I'm keen to get my Normans done, before they take to the field in the club Saga campaign.
I did do a wildcard piece though - the warlord for my Normans. This is the William the Bastard model from Gripping Beast, and it's a great miniature. Really easy to paint too, the details stand out nicely. Just needs the base edging doing, the rest of the model was still wet when I took the photo so I left that off.
Ha! April Fool! I actually suck.
My targets for April were to paint my Sword Dancer cavalry for Very British Civil War, build some Sword Dancer infantry, and paint a unit for Saga.
As I've already posted, I did the unit for Saga:
I also painted Alan the horse:
I put together the Sword Dancer infantry (I like how these have come out, especially the sniper! More on them in future I think.):
But despite starting them, I didn't get the Sword Dancer cavalry done:
I just didn't get into doing these. I'll try again for April I think, but at the moment I'm mostly in a Saga frame of mind. I'm keen to get my Normans done, before they take to the field in the club Saga campaign.
I did do a wildcard piece though - the warlord for my Normans. This is the William the Bastard model from Gripping Beast, and it's a great miniature. Really easy to paint too, the details stand out nicely. Just needs the base edging doing, the rest of the model was still wet when I took the photo so I left that off.
And, just as a little extra piece, I did this casualty marker (needs some ink to finish it off though):
I didn't get as much time as I normally have for painting this month. With a baby on the way in September, and as of last weekend an offer on our house meaning we need to find a new one, that's not going to improve for April.
So, I need some new targets. Since they need to be simple, I'll go for just finishing off the Sword Dancer cavalry, and painting another unit of Normans - hearthguard this time.
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